In this series, we look at how practicing self-love in 12 specific ways actually helps you attract romantic love. In this video, we’re talking about self love tip NUMBER THREE – Stop scaring yourself with doomsday scenarios about your love life. 

If you’ve been hearing a lot about self-love, but you don’t know what that means specifically this series is for you. It’s also for you if you’re wondering what the connection is between self love and attracting a relationship.

Louise Hay was the queen of self love and wrote tons of books about it, including You Can Heal Your Life and Mirror Work.

So what we’re doing in this series, is we are looking at how Louise Hay’s 12 self love practices help you when you have the specific goal of attracting love. 

In this video, we’re focusing in on what to do to when you find yourself preoccupied with fearful thoughts about the future of your love life. 


  • Focusing on your fears about the future, keeps you from seeing the good that’s in your present – like other forms of love you’re already receiving, besides romantic love. 
  • What you focus on is magnified in your life and your experience. So focusing on fears about being alone or never finding love just gives you more fears to focus on. 
  • Focusing on your fears interrupts your manifesting mojo in life and in love. It takes you out of your power as a co-creator of your life with the Divine. It moves you away from your soulmate in energy (unless you’re trying to attract a soulmate who is also fearful).
  • Fearful thoughts about your future usually don’t come true anyway, so it’s a waste of time and energy to stay focused on them. That’s time and energy you can use to build the future you want instead of fearing a future that probably isn’t even going to happen. Every single client I’ve worked with had fears about ending up alone and not being able to heal and 87% of them were in happy, healthy relationships within 3-6 months of our work together.


  • Notice your body’s signs of fear and anxiety. 
    • Shallow breathing
    • Flinching
    • Startling
  • When you notice your signs, begin deep breathing. Confirm and affirm that you are safe. It can be helpful to sit down with your back against a wall (that tells your body that you are safe and won’t be vulnerable to being attacked from behind). Breathe deeply and say, “safe” over and over until you feel yourself relax. 
  • One thing you can do is to create a spiritual practice that brings you into the present in a powerful way. That is exactly what GRATITUDE does. It wrenches your attention away from phantom fears of the future and into the beautiful bounty of the present…the love of family, friends, pets…good health, enough money, the opportunity to evolve. 
  • If you feel your fear and anxiety are getting out of your control, get professional help. Don’t keep trying to “go it alone”. You are worth taking care of. 

So, now I want to hear from you high-vibe, single ladies! How does your body respond when you are scaring yourself? Let me know in the comments. 

If you enjoyed this video, don’t forget to like and subscribe. If you need more help healing your heart energetically from the pain of past heartache, get your {free} e-book, The Heartache Cure™

And remember, self love is the best love, so love you first, love you best and all other kinds of love will flow to you. Take care.